Cats sleep 20 hours a day, eat half an hour a day, and bathe for the other 3 and a half hours.

Jennifer ~ Charlie asked me to marry him and make him the happiest man in the world.

Ashley ~ And which one of these you decided to do?

Gameshow Host: : In which European country is Mount Etna?
Contestant: Japan

Gameshow Host: In case you did not hear me say European, I can let you try again.
Contestant: Mexico?

New gardeners learn by by trowel and error.

I was waitressing at a restaurant where we would slice bread fresh and bring it to the tables, and whenever someone asked me to bring them the heel, I would tell them that I couldn’t…I had divorced him already.

“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.” – Yogi Berra

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Click here to listen to Episode 39